Even more daft things

japottinger
8th January 2009, 21:28
I recall on Manipur at Smiths Dock in Middlesborough for some repairs when some of their men were chipping the hull just below the engineers duty mess. We were in there for smoko and the din was horrendous, so one of the lads went out and leaned over the side " any of you fancy a cup of tea?" Watch the rush, and when all the Smiths men were in the mess room he went outside and threw all their chipping hammers in the drink!
Nearly an international incident until all was smoothed over.

john g
24th February 2009, 20:23
Being the night man in Calcutta gave you the run of the galley with a steward ...ok till they started chipping the decks in the morning

Derek Roger
24th February 2009, 22:03
I was on nights in Calcutta ( 5th Eng ) on Mahout ; 2nd Mate Colin Kingston was working nights alos . He had the galley keys and would make the most wonderfull breakfast around 4 0'clock . All the eggs bacon sausages black pudding ; the works .
It was the best job in Calcutta as the nights were quite pleasant for us to work in cpmpared to the heat of the day .

Oh happy days . Derek

Don A.Macleod
26th February 2009, 01:07
This is true.The Maihar/Mahsud had a small lift (dumb waiter type) between the galley and the the side loader flat (where the fridges were) which was on the deck below.One night(early hours) I was called by by an irate fellow officer that there was a problem inasmuch that another fellow officer was trapped in the lift.These lifts were big enough to accomodate a body if bent over and jammed in. In this case the body was a bit overweight and tripped the overload.
To rescue this fellow access to the galley was necessary which meant arousing a senior member of the catering staff to open the galley. It then came to light that this wasn't the first time that guys had come back from shore and feeling peckish made for the galley fridge by this route,it had been noticed apparently that food had been going awol but this time it backfired.
No action was taken against the culprits but it didn't happen again.Happy days.Where theres a will there is a way!

Derek Roger
26th February 2009, 01:49
This is true.The Maihar/Mahsud had a small lift (dumb waiter type) between the galley and the the side loader flat (where the fridges were) which was on the deck below.One night(early hours) I was called by by an irate fellow officer that there was a problem inasmuch that another fellow officer was trapped in the lift.These lifts were big enough to accomodate a body if bent over and jammed in. In this case the body was a bit overweight and tripped the overload.
To rescue this fellow access to the galley was necessary which meant arousing a senior member of the catering staff to open the galley. It then came to light that this wasn't the first time that guys had come back from shore and feeling peckish made for the galley fridge by this route,it had been noticed apparently that food had been going awol but this time it backfired.
No action was taken against the culprits but it didn't happen again.Happy days.Where theres a will there is a way!

It was never a problem for me Don as I had stood bye Mahsud and had a pass key ( which I kept ). The galley was never "off limits "

Happy days ; Derek

Fieldsy
26th February 2009, 09:48
On a Harrison ship in Glasgow. After we'd come back from the pub one night everyone was starving but the pantry was locked. When in the saloon that evening, I'd noticed that the dogs on the porthole by my table weren't screwed down.
Going out on deck, I checked and the porthole was indeed unsecured. It was oblong and about two feet high - I reckoned I could get through it. Having got into a kneeling position on the sill (cill?) and with the back of my neck wedged against the top of the porthole, I was stuck and couldn't move. Looking in, there was a table about three feet away. I worked out that if I fell forward I'd be able to get my hands on the table, then drag my legs in.
The table sat 8 and was about 8ft in diameter. I fell forward and hit the table with both hands. It was supported on a central pillar and my weight hitting the edge of the table was too much. The table top came adrift from the pillar and I found myself lying in a pile of debris. The table had been set for breakfast - side plates, cutlery, water glasses, salt, pepper, brown sauce and ketchup. Lots of things had smashed and I was covered in sauce.

I gingerly got to my feet - discovering (as usually happens when drunk) that I'd escaped injury other than what would no doubt be bruises the next day. The key was in the lock to the door of the bar. I turned the key and opened the door. About a dozen people were there, frozen in shock and staring at me. They'd heard this almighty crash, then the key turning in the lock, and hadn't known what to expect.

After wetting themselves laughing when they heard what I'd done, they trooped through the saloon into the pantry and made loads of sandwiches.
When all done, one of the smaller guys stayed in the saloon (I'm 6' 5") and it would be easier for him to climb out the porthole I'd come in through. He locked the door again, climbed out and came back to the bar.

The next day the Captain called the police, as somebody had broken into the saloon and stolen some food! We had a watchman on the gangway after that.
The next day, I was indeed heavily bruised - but relieved I'd gotten away with it.

Just waiting for Gerry Whitehead to read this now and give me a bollocking!

taxidave
22nd April 2009, 23:04
I recall on Manipur at Smiths Dock in Middlesborough for some repairs when some of their men were chipping the hull just below the engineers duty mess. We were in there for smoko and the din was horrendous, so one of the lads went out and leaned over the side " any of you fancy a cup of tea?" Watch the rush, and when all the Smiths men were in the mess room he went outside and threw all their chipping hammers in the drink!
Nearly an international incident until all was smoothed over.
Was the date of this incident in the September of 1955?
Taxidave

japottinger
25th April 2009, 18:19
Was the date of this incident in the September of 1955?
Taxidave

Hello Taxidave, it was between 4/9/58 and7/9/59. Being an Anorak I kept a diary of Stand By, FWE, FA etc on all ports on Brocklebank ships I served on!

Jim S
8th May 2009, 19:14
Brocklebank's finest will recall that there was a screen bulkhead that separated the engine room from the boiler room on some if not all the Scotch boilered ships. - The following story I was told by a 2nd Engineer. - On one such ship the 2nd Engineer (not the story teller) noticed an Ag Wallah asleep sitting on a valve chest as he passed through into the boiler room. Going back into the engine room he picked up a hammer to teach the sleeper a lesson. Stricking the screen bulkhead he then passed through the screen bulkhead with the intention of reprimanding the sleeper. Imagine his horror when he discovered the Ag Wallah lying unconscious on the floor plates.
The Ag Wallah had been asleep with the back of his head resting on the bulkhead so when our hero hit it with his hammer it was as if he had hit the sleeper on the head.
I believe the 2nd Engineer retreated to the engine room as if nothing was amiss leaving the unfortunate soul to come to and wonder what had happened to him.

japottinger
15th May 2009, 20:43
Our 2nd Elect on Manipur was overhauling the fan motor on one of the engine room vents, somehow when releasing it from the mounting he managed to drop it down the trunk to fall all the way doiwn on the manov. platform, as we were a bit cheesed off why he was taking so long to fix it before the Elec. could come down to see what was what the 4th Eng lay down prone under the vent with a tarp. over him, much to the horror of the Elec. when he reached the engine room! His distress was much augmented by the obvious moans of distress emanating from the 4th!

peter3807
16th May 2009, 00:11
Cadet on a RQD Bulkie.
The Mates toilet midships was blocked. Just after lunch the mate told me and another cadet to clear it with the Sanisnake. You know, that length of uncontrollable wire attached to a hand drill. He then took to his bunk. After an hour of trying to drill out some impressively compacted turds we gave up, had Smoko then found something more interesting, like chipping. Mate woke up for the 4 to 8 and was less than impressed when the toilet was still blocked. Dragged us down to the store below the midships accommodation and set about some pipe work with a couple of Stilsons, " If you can't get it from above, get it from below" We backed off with helpful comments like " Er Sir, I don't think, Maybe, Don't you think, it might " And it did, blockage spectacularly cleared, two cadets clearing the midships store at speed and slowly followed by a wet and rather aromatic mate. I can still recall the small piece of turd stuck to his nose.
You don't need to guess who had to clear up the resultant mess.

Peter