The world today

John Glover
8th January 2009, 22:40
*** NEW ELEMENT FOUND ***


Investigators at a major research institute have discovered the heaviest element known to science, tentatively named ADMINISTRATUM (AD).
The new element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0.

It does however have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, and are surrounded by particles called peons.
Administratum atoms are not easy to locate and can only be found in hidden clusters called meetings.

Since it has no electrons, Administratum is inert. However it can be detected, as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
According to the researchers a minute amount of Administratum causes one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally
take less than a minute.

Administratum has a normal half life of approximately four years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of
the assistant neutrons, vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. In fact an Administratum sample's mass will actually increase over a given time. Since with each reorganisation, some of the morons inevitably become neutrons forming new clusters. The charateristics of moron enhancement lead some scientists to speculate that Administratum is formed wherever morons reach a sufficient mass or concentration. This hypothetical quantity is reffered
to as "Critical Morass".

(K) A bit like our leaders ??? (K)