The day it all went wrong

Arthur Jenner
10th February 2009, 04:03
The Day When Everything Went Wrong
by AJ

“I will always remember that day when everything went wrong”
“I can’t remember a day when everything went right”
“Don’t be silly. Everything goes right on most days.”
“There is always some little thing that doesn’t go quite right on every day.”
“Well there aren’t many days when everything, and I mean literally everything, goes haywire.”
“Go on then, tell me about that horrible day.”
“If you would shut up for a few minutes and listen, I will. It was about twenty years ago. I had just started going out with you. My leave was over and I had to report to the Tilbury Pool Office”
“Yes, I remember. I had a day off and we were going to go together.”
“That’s right. I took a taxi to your place and your mother said you weren’t up yet so I waited and waited for you; forgetting that the bleedin’ taxi was waiting outside with his meter ticking over. By the time I remembered he’d clocked up a fortune.”
“It wasn’t my fault. I’d had a late night.”
“Well it wasn’t with me. Must have been with your other bloke. Anyway the stupid taxi driver ran out of petrol and we had to catch the bus to Sidcup station. The bus ran late and we missed the train to Gravesend and by the time we got off the ferry at Tilbury it was mid afternoon and we’d had no lunch.”
“So we stopped at the station bar for a sandwich.”
“But you had to make a bloomin’ meal of it.”
“And then you, of course, had to have a pint that became about a gallon.”
“So by the time we got to the pool office it was almost about to close and they offered me that rotten ship and I was too far gone to realise what it was so I took it. ”
“I did tell you, but you wouldn’t listen.”
“That hungry ship was away nearly two years and by the time I got back home you’d married that other bloke, Billy Black.”
“Oh well, it didn’t turn out all bad for you then, did it.”
“No, that was the one really good thing to come out of it.”

Sister Eleff
10th February 2009, 04:16
Well Arthur it was 20 years ago & you are still talking to her! What happened to Billy Black?

Arthur Jenner
10th February 2009, 07:52
He skinned out in Northampton and was eaten by cannibals

looneylectrics
10th February 2009, 14:41
Arthur you have a very active mind and write good posts, if you ever posted your laundry list I swear I would read it and enjoy it.

John Briggs
10th February 2009, 16:42
Another good one Arthur!