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  #101  
Old 6th January 2015, 14:28
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makko makko is offline  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John Rogers View Post
That's the way it should be, just like an aircraft.
John,

Some of the landbased units are now running to 16,000 hours between major overhauls, John! Better materials, better machining, better instrumentation. They still go BANG though every once in a while. There are still things, such as inclusions in the crankshaft forging that cannot be detected.

Rgds.
Dave
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  #102  
Old 6th January 2015, 14:46
Baz1uk Baz1uk is offline  
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On one of the "Glen/Shire boats,Engineer Cadets painted under the Settee in Half Deck Dayroom with Bitumastic Paint. When the Old Man on rounds threw his Cap, with white cover under the Settee and told the Senior Middy,"Retrieve my cap", it came out covered. The Old man threw a fit.When asked for an explanation,Eng Cadet said they found a spot of rust and treated it. Chief Eng struggled to keep a straight face.
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  #103  
Old 6th January 2015, 15:46
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Basil Basil is offline  
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A course or two before ours, mid course sneaked into junior course WC just before squadron commander's inspection and smeared peanut butter around just under rim.
Enter Sqn Cdr, white gloves etc - well, you know the rest
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  #104  
Old 6th January 2015, 20:48
OilJiver OilJiver is offline  
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Originally Posted by makko View Post
Correct, Basil. full overhaul of generators at 500 hours. Change injectors, swap heads, take leads, etc. On the Barber Priam, we had five gennies. We could do the ohaul in our sleep!
Rgds.
Dave
Wow…..that’s a bit extreme Dave. Even on some of the old stone crushers that I worked on years ago; it would be about 1500hrs for injectors (running on MDO), 3000hrs for heads and double that before any major work. (Bet you didn’t have much trouble with the kit though!).

Getting back to the thread…I remember a time when a new (relatively young) Captain joined ship to relieve a very experienced and down-to-earth Old Man. The new guy quickly went about establishing himself – nothing wrong in that, except this included carrying out an engine room inspection during rounds - (blow me, outside of standbys, even the Chief would visit almost by prior appointment). Donks & the ER crowd were A1 to a man and the engine room was always immaculate, even soon after major work. So, on the third occasion of ER inspections during rounds, I thought a little education was called for. The 8-12 watch-keeper signalled when the Old Man was passing very close by the stand by genny; I then started it from the control room. Had the desired effect and the visitor nigh on jumped out of his skin – didn’t see him much after that.
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  #105  
Old 28th January 2016, 19:44
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Seaspread Seaspread is offline  
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Does anyone remember the Skipper on the Transval castle, swivel Lloyd and his boots with his trolley full of cleaning stuff you could not get, that ship must have been the cleanest ship in the merch at the time, ha ha ha.
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  #106  
Old 31st October 2016, 17:45
Puffin's skipper Puffin's skipper is offline
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Originally Posted by jaolt1 View Post
Hi...sailed With A Skipper That Among Other Things During His Rounds On Sunday At 1000 Would Check Under The Cap Of Ketchup Bottles In The Messroom To Ensure There Was No Build Up Of The Red Sauce!!
As sailors Peggy on a Wilson Boat I vividly remember a big Norwegian AB threatening me with violence about the very same thing , (except it was an HP sauce bottle.) "If you not wipe black crap off top of this bottle Peggy, I hit you with him."... About a week later the deck crowd came in the mess for Smoko and that was the last thing I remembered before waking up on no 3 hatch cover with a very bad headache.. The Norske Neanderthal had laid me out cold with the heavy square sauce bottle..

(Mind you I must admit it did have the desired effect. After that I whipped out a cloth and buffed it up shinier than the ships bell every time any AB put it back down on the table.)

Last edited by Puffin's skipper; 31st October 2016 at 17:48..
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  #107  
Old 31st October 2016, 19:27
E.Martin E.Martin is offline  
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Our toilet rolls are always overwind
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  #108  
Old 31st October 2016, 20:05
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Stephen J. Card Stephen J. Card is online now  
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If the roll hang down the back.... the sheets will get wet from the condensation running down on the bulkhead. Just common sense... I think!
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  #109  
Old 31st October 2016, 23:59
trotterdotpom trotterdotpom is offline  
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Originally Posted by Stephen J. Card View Post
If the roll hang down the back.... the sheets will get wet from the condensation running down on the bulkhead. Just common sense... I think!
Tell that to a woman, for some reason they always put it on the wrong way.

John T
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  #110  
Old 1st November 2016, 02:48
Winmar Winmar is offline  
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I remember as Chief Off, accompanying a particularly odious master on Sunday rounds. This particular gentleman was hated by all. He was a bully who always picked on galley boys, cadets etc, you will all know the type. At around
06.00hrs one Sunday whilst tank cleaning, I paid a visit to the galley for a brew were I found the galley boy running his bell end around the rim of a large mug. I gave him a rocket but when he assured me it was for a practical joke I let it go. However, later on in the morning whilst in the galley for inspection, the old man asked for a sample of the drinking water to check. The galley boy presented him with a large mug full!!! I pissed myself laughing, he told me to pull myself together and finished me off by saying it was very tasty! The thought of the old bas**** drinking knob flavoured water has not left me in nearly 30 years. When I rose to the dizzy heights myself I was always nice to the galley staff!
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  #111  
Old 1st November 2016, 12:29
stehogg stehogg is offline  
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Captains inspections

Concur with #102 on the Flintshire ,old man was one Captain Punchard,of who as 3rd trip eng cadets,we were somewhat in awe of.The same steaming bonnet duly skimmed under the half deck setee to be retrieved by said cadet and praying that there was no dust on the white cap cover.The only saving grace for us that trip was the ch/eng,whos name escapes me,but would always put in a good word for us if all went well with said inspection,I think he saw it as his way of praising us ,unlike Capt Punchard who probably thought eng cadets were not worthy of anything only ridicule.
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  #112  
Old 1st November 2016, 13:06
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trotterdotpom View Post
Tell that to a woman, for some reason they always put it on the wrong way.

John T

Come on. You want an argument over a piece.... sorry, a piece of loo paper. Not worth it!
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  #113  
Old 1st November 2016, 18:54
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Originally Posted by Stephen J. Card View Post
Come on. You want an argument over a piece.... sorry, a piece of loo paper. Not worth it!
There have been small wars fought over this. I got between wife and eldest daughter, ED will change the thing over. Cue massive explosion, and we are a very placid bunch, but this!!!
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  #114  
Old 1st November 2016, 19:17
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makko makko is offline  
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Originally Posted by Stephen J. Card View Post
If the roll hang down the back.... the sheets will get wet from the condensation running down on the bulkhead. Just common sense... I think!
In our house, due to the material used in the wall, I installed some heavy duty expanding anchors with hex head bolts to fix the bog roll holder to the wall. The holder has glass sides and a curves stainless steel cover that goes over the roll.

Now, if it is "paper out" then as the roll turns, it will ride up against the hex heads and rip the roll. If it is "paper in" then the roll is pulled away from the hex heads and you get a nice length. As the roll diameter diminishes, either way will work!

Rgds.
Dave
"Chief Roll Adjuster for Paper" - [email protected] Institute qualified.
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  #115  
Old 1st November 2016, 19:27
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John Rogers John Rogers is offline  
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We have no problems in my house as the square sheets of newspaper hangs nicely on the nail, plus for back-up there is always the Sears catalog, a little glossy perhaps but still does the job.
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  #116  
Old 3rd November 2016, 15:43
Puffin's skipper Puffin's skipper is offline
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I remember being on one ship where the OM had come over to Dutch Shell from the RFA Tankers, one of our AB's had once sailed with him on the Tidereach and said he was a right prat, he thought himself an incarnation of Lord Nelson.
He really was in his 'Navy' element on 10am Sunday inspections and instead of 20 minutes made them last till lunchtime... We were never sure if he really was insane or just had an eccentric sense of humour.. Either way his Sunday inspections (with white gloves on) were entertaining to say the very least, provided you had bulled your own waste bin and ashtray to a shine..
While waiting, (by your beds men) one young Ordinary Seaman was stood by his door having a quick drag when the OM walked out of the next cabin earlier than expected and 'horrors' he was left holding the 'tab' of a roll up in his hand. Not wanting to "mucky" his ashtray, and with no time to get to the porthole he 'hid' it up on the top of his cabin door, which was on the hook.. The cabin was spotless, bed folded & creased neatly and (unusually for him) the OM found nothing wrong whatsover..
As he walked back out he casually put his hand up and ran a gloved finger along the top of the door, checking it for dust. The offending "dog end" bounced down and out into the alleyway.. The Skippers eyes widenened as he stared down at it in shocked horror for perhaps a full 30 seconds before final speaking.. Turning round to the 1st Officer he snapped out, "Don't just stand there Number one, go fetch a shovel, dig me out of this crap, then have this seaman flogged"...

As I also remember though, the same OM also had his one "good" Navy tradition. "Grog issue". While tank cleaning at EVERY single exit back up top from our tank 'diving' (ie: smoko am, dinnertime, smoko pm and daywork end) he would send the mate out with bottles of 'Four Bells' rum and a glass, (used in turn in a queue) for our liberal 'grog' tot to 'Get the gas out of our lungs'.. By teatime, with our 4th "Navy style ration" of the day down our necks, we were all well ratted..

Last edited by Puffin's skipper; 3rd November 2016 at 16:27..
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  #117  
Old 4th December 2018, 12:04
morky1 morky1 is offline  
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I was caterer on the Sailing vessel STS Leeuwin and the master (Chris Blake ) had a party trick on rounds day in the trainees quarters, he would don a rubber glove and reach into the S-bend, something that brought the trainees undone, especially if he pulled a cooked sausage in his paw, something that happened occasionally
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  #118  
Old 24th May 2020, 15:28
bazza9999 bazza9999 is offline
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On the RMS Durango we would have Captain inspections on a weekly basis, each Sunday if I remember correctly.
These were generally white glove affairs and carried out by the Old Man, Chief Engineer and Chief Steward.
As the Pantry Boy ("Pants") I was advised that the OM had a habit of placing a penny on a high ledge, to check the following week if the ledge had been cleaned.
Shortly after I did find a single penny in the pantry, and replaced it with two ha'pennys. The OM's face was priceless, he looked at the coins on the pantry deck, looked at me and the Chief Steward and carried on.
I never found any more coins after that!
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  #119  
Old 24th May 2020, 17:34
lakercapt lakercapt is offline  
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I never at any time enjoyed doing the Masters inspections but it was a requirement off the company. Mainly to see their property was being cared for and no unauthorized fitting or electrical equipment installed.
I even remember when there had to be an entry in the official log book 'anti scabotics issued"( to stop scurvy) that was the BOT lime juice which was kept in the bonded locker as it had alcohol
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  #120  
Old 24th May 2020, 17:36
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We had a First Officer who always accompanied the OM and his team during the march of the unemployed. This guy had a habit of picking up stray items and saying “what’s this doing kicking around making the place untidy.” I was one of the ROs and prior to a rounds, got a big power capacitor maybe 200 uF and charged it up with a megger. Previously I had strapped a couple of wires down the outside of the capacitor and left it well in sight on the radio office bench awaiting the inspection. Sure enough, the bait was taken and even the OM laughed. Good old RFA days.
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  #121  
Old 24th May 2020, 17:38
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I never at any time enjoyed doing the Masters inspections but it was a requirement off the company. Mainly to see their property was being cared for and no unauthorized fitting or electrical equipment installed.
I even remember when there had to be an entry in the official log book 'anti scabotics issued"( to stop scurvy) that was the BOT lime juice which was kept in the bonded locker as it had alcohol
I remember getting lime juice as an unsweetened concentrated light brown liquid, it was incredibly refreshing with a very weak concentrations. One bottle to an Olympic swimming pool, I would think.
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  #122  
Old 24th May 2020, 23:15
lakercapt lakercapt is offline  
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I remember getting lime juice as an unsweetened concentrated light brown liquid, it was incredibly refreshing with a very weak concentrations. One bottle to an Olympic swimming pool, I would think.
A splash of that and some raw sugar (from the cargo) and a large tot of the famous elixir Four Bells Rum and you had a wonderful refreshing bevy.
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  #123  
Old 24th May 2020, 23:34
KEITHMAR KEITHMAR is offline  
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No wonder some of these characters had a hard time when They finally came ashore..... Captains and Chief Officers doing Engine Room inspections?? Jesus!!During My years I sailed with a couple of Chief Engineers who DIDN·T know where the Engine WAS!! Well You know what I mean, and good blokes They were too!They KNEW exactly what was going on .One of Them had a chat with the Second, And Me, and the freezer, EVERY morning at 8 oclock in His office, Perfect.Advice given and received, He then went back to typing His Memoirs.During a 4month voyage I think We saw him in theE/R Twice , once after a slight collision wih the dock .. on a very windy night in Marseille , and once when the Lads were pulling a unit.He used to say it was "TOO bloody noisy down there for Me"And I think He meant IT. The OM: an d the C:O: would never have got in to do an inspection.And regulations apart I don·t remember Him taking part in any Sunday inspections, HE was a 6ft 4 EX R:N: Eng Commadore and one of the RN last" hard hat" Divers ......Lovely Bloke!
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  #124  
Old 5th June 2020, 23:43
notnila notnila is offline  
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Originally Posted by ALAN TYLER View Post
Usually these took place once a week, I remember the ritual of cleaning the fridges the night before and getting a bottle of rum, not forgetting overtime. Does anyone have any memories of these inspections, I remember a certain Captain (can,t remember his name) in Houlders who insisted the toilet rolls hung outwards!!!
Its got to be the same Master I sailed with on the Beauval, my DB was lost years ago,so I can't remember his name either.He was a bit of a kleptomaniac and even after inspecting Chippy's locker the 2nd Steward would return a screwdriver or a chisel or even a handful of nails!Other than that he was quite harmless!
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  #125  
Old 6th June 2020, 15:33
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No wonder some of these characters had a hard time when They finally came ashore..... Captains and Chief Officers doing Engine Room inspections?? Jesus!!During My years I sailed with a couple of Chief Engineers who DIDN·T know where the Engine WAS!! Well You know what I mean, and good blokes They were too!They KNEW exactly what was going on .One of Them had a chat with the Second, And Me, and the freezer, EVERY morning at 8 oclock in His office, Perfect.Advice given and received, He then went back to typing His Memoirs.During a 4month voyage I think We saw him in theE/R Twice , once after a slight collision wih the dock .. on a very windy night in Marseille , and once when the Lads were pulling a unit.He used to say it was "TOO bloody noisy down there for Me"And I think He meant IT. The OM: an d the C:O: would never have got in to do an inspection.And regulations apart I don·t remember Him taking part in any Sunday inspections, HE was a 6ft 4 EX R:N: Eng Commadore and one of the RN last" hard hat" Divers ......Lovely Bloke!
One C/E, who only made brief appearances when STBY was rung, decided during BoT games to have a "fire" in the engine room and simulate smoke by turning the lights off.

Now, the way into the control room was directl fwd from the lift in the accom internal ladder well which accessed all decks. Left, was the pressure lock for the ER. Access to the top plates was by one of two doors at either end of the main control panel. Outside the doors ran a pipe which the engineers knew to duck under as they went out.

Well, C/E in ER, lights turned off and, brandishing his brand new torch, he led the way to "fight fire". Luckily he had a safety helmet on: Yes, straight into the pipe he went! The 2/E just said "get the bluddy lights on!". The drill was then changed to medevac of inhured crewmember from ER.

Although the C/E continued to make his rare appearances, never again did I see him exit the CR to the topplates! Lift/CR/Lift was the rule!

Rgds.
Dave
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