[Barrie Youde]

Last week in Finland our daughter Helena introduced us to three of her university-chums who stayed with us for a few days, adding greatly to the fun. Unmentioned in the introduction was an especial talent which each one has, in addition to many others. Gentle reader, read on:-

The Bathing Party

Three maidens once a-bathing went,
Charlotte, Rose and Anna.
All decorum. Best intent
In every proper manner.

Decorum is my middle name.
To watch, I would not dare,
As they disported at their game
And bathed and washed their hair:

And frolicked, at the water’s edge,
As maidens oft will sport.
I left them to it, by my pledge,
As, so it seemed, I ought.

Silence was the next I heard.
Alas! Alack! But why?
No sound, but of a twitter-bird!
There was no maiden-cry!

Thus, to the water’s edge I ran.
No bodies to be seen.
What next? Am I a mouse or man?
It was a dreadful scene!

As, there across the water
Heads were bobbing one, two, three,
Upon the Gulf of Bothnia
And heading out to sea!

“Man the boat and go for them!”
To Helena I called.
Said she, “This much I know of them,
They would be quite appalled.

They are long-distance swimmers.
They are on a training-jaunt.
They are seasoned. Not beginners.
Your concern you should not flaunt.”

Home then came the maidens three,
In stately styles and graces,
As mermaids of the Baltic Sea,
With smiles upon their faces!

BY
15.08.2018

 

[rickles23]

Good poetry. Regards

 

[Barrie Youde]

Thank you, Rick.

After it was all over, I was reminded of Betjeman's poem of Captain Matthew Webb, the first man to swim the English Channel. His poem is called "The Shropshire Lad" - and is not to be confused with AE Housman. Webb was born at Dawley in Shropshire - and Betjeman is very funny!

 

[Long gone]

Thank you, Rick.

After it was all over, I was reminded of Betjeman's poem of Captain Matthew Webb, the first man to swim the English Channel. His poem is called "The Shropshire Lad" - and is not to be confused with AE Housman. Webb was born at Dawley in Shropshire - and Betjeman is very funny!

Set to music by John Kirkpatrick, a well-known Shropshire folk singer and squeeze box player

 

[Barrie Youde]

Thank you, LG.

Betjeman's poem is a gentle satire on the glorification of Webb, but the way Kirkpatrick sings it, he misses the satire altogether. He makes it sound like a simple folk-song, which isn't the style at all of Betjeman, the master of the gentle extraction of urine.

 

[rickles23]

What a coincidence, I am a Shropshire lad but moved out to Australia. Regards

 

[Barrie Youde]

Well, well, well!

Today I joined a bathing party of one, doing my best to emulate Matthew Webb. How so?

Our daughter Anni's boyfriend (Robbie) is a decent egg. They proposed to visit us for a few days, arriving this evening from London. Nothing unusual there, save that Robbie intended to cycle from London to us in Wirral. Gulp. And so he set out, but soon realised that his ETA was ambitious and therefore amended his plans by putting his bike on the train at Shrewsbury for the last distance to Chester. Should I (gentle reader?) cycle to Chester to meet him and pilot him for the last ten/twelve miles home along the new cycle track ?

"Quel gentil," dit la famille.

The train was late and and I had time to kill at Chester. Eventually it arrived and we set off for the journey home, the first mile or so of which is along the Shropshire Union Canal towpath. Alas, Alack, misjudging cyclical control beneath a particularly low pack-horse bridge, I took a header into the canal , complete with bicycle. Every cloud has a silver lining. This week my watch is in for repair, so at least that was not damaged.

First man on the scene, coming towards us, saw me standing chest-deep in the canal fishing for my bike and asked "Did you do that on purpose?" (A promising press reporters, perhaps?)

The only damage seems to be to my mobile phone, which I'd guess is a write-off - but some suggest leaving it buried in dry rice, which is where it is at present. Any suggestions as to how to resuscitate a drowned mobile phone would be greatly appreciated.

 

[cleansweeploch]

Oh Barry, perhaps you should have engaged the services of a Shropshire Union Canal pilot ?
Sorry, I can't help you with your phone problem.

 

[Barrie Youde]

#8

Thank you!

B

 

[YM-Mundrabilla]

A hair dryer won't help.
At least it didn't help mine after a trip (cycle) (Jester) through the washing machine.
I like to be helpful! (Wave)

 

[Varley]

Whilst you are probably right Barrie (unless the battery happened to fall out at the same time) I would prescribe washing in freshwater (assuming canal water, whilst not saline, might contain something by way of TDS that one would not want drying out on something you put to your ear or a double sided circuit board). And then put in a 'tent' with a dehumidifier.

I aminterested in the dry ice idea but only as an advocate of the horned one. Why freeze the contamination in situ instead of getting rid of it and then drying? Bombarding dirty wound machines is a fairly new technique for cleaning them. The solid particles act as a sort of soft sandblasting carrying off the debris to be swept up before or after the CO2 has evaporated.

Perhaps a home experiment if you have a CO2 extinguisher handy?

 

[Barrie Youde]

#10 and #11

Very many thanks for both suggestions!

Will keep trying - and drying.

B

 

[spongebob]

Barry , your #7 reminds me of a similar plunge. It was just after VJ Day when our father had bought my older sister and I brand new bicycles , the first batch imported into NZ post WW2.
We decided to cycle from our rural home into town to attend the Saturday matinee at the local cinema , a distance of about eight miles , and as we coasted down a long hill after a hard peddle slog up I must have drifted into a euphoric dream of new bike ,new boundaries , no limits ,because I rode slap bang into a small bridge abutment that sent me over the handle bars to land in a small shallow creek bed with the bicycle landing on top of me. No injuries apart from bruising and grazing but the image still exists of the crumpled front wheel almost folded in half and with the inner tube protruding out like a huge party balloon .
My father's wrath was minimised by the luckiness of my escape of serious injury and the real penalty was the wait for several weeks for the bike repairs.

Bob

 

[Barrie Youde]

Ouch!

That sounds painful, Bob - whereas mine was merely embarrassing!

The important thing is that we survive to tell these stupid tales!

 

[Duncan112]

Well, well, well!

Today I joined a bathing party of one, doing my best to emulate Matthew Webb. How so?

Our daughter Anni's boyfriend (Robbie) is a decent egg. They proposed to visit us for a few days, arriving this evening from London. Nothing unusual there, save that Robbie intended to cycle from London to us in Wirral. Gulp. And so he set out, but soon realised that his ETA was ambitious and therefore amended his plans by putting his bike on the train at Shrewsbury for the last distance to Chester. Should I (gentle reader?) cycle to Chester to meet him and pilot him for the last ten/twelve miles home along the new cycle track ?

"Quel gentil," dit la famille.

The train was late and and I had time to kill at Chester. Eventually it arrived and we set off for the journey home, the first mile or so of which is along the Shropshire Union Canal towpath. Alas, Alack, misjudging cyclical control beneath a particularly low pack-horse bridge, I took a header into the canal , complete with bicycle. Every cloud has a silver lining. This week my watch is in for repair, so at least that was not damaged.

First man on the scene, coming towards us, saw me standing chest-deep in the canal fishing for my bike and asked "Did you do that on purpose?" (A promising press reporters, perhaps?)

The only damage seems to be to my mobile phone, which I'd guess is a write-off - but some suggest leaving it buried in dry rice, which is where it is at present. Any suggestions as to how to resuscitate a drowned mobile phone would be greatly appreciated.

FWIW I've had success with rice, following my step son's ipod going through the washing machine

 

[Mad Landsman]

Unfortunately dunking a mobile phone is more often than not terminal.
I once had the misfortune of having a phone fall in the garden pond from my shirt pocket. I recovered it immediately and went straight to my bench where I have the means to dismantle such devices. Even then there was some damage to a couple of minor connections some of which I was able to repair. The phone still works to this day as a back-up but some functions never returned.
I have attempted the use of desiccant gel on someone else's dunked phone but it was apparently too far gone.
The uncooked rice idea seems to be based on the idea that rice, which looks similar to desiccant gel crystals, has a similar function - I am not so sure, but it is worth a try.

 

[Barrie Youde]

Repeated thanks, chaps, for all.

There is still not a spark of life out of my phone but I can report that all of the rice in which it has now sat for 24 hours (having been changed once) is decidedly damp. Is this capillary action (or some such)? Please don't hit me. For sure, it illustrates a property of dry rice acting as blotting paper.

 

[spongebob]

My old mobile was left on an outside window sill in pouring rain for day or two.
I left it to dry on top of our gas fired hot water cylinder to no avail then dumped it in a drawer for weeks . Pam saw it there , decided it might need charging and Lo and behold it worked. Never say die.

Bob

 

[John Rogers]

The bowl of rice will work on a wet phone.

 

[Barrie Youde]

#18 and # 19

Thank you, Chaps!

That is most encouraging.