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I have a tree that has leaned over my front lawn to the extent that I couldn't get my mower under it. Right so, it has to go, and yesterday when the blistering heat subsided a bit I took my small chainsaw and shredder to deal with it. Work was going well, except that my chainsaw started to cut out with smoke coming out of various orifices.

Oh well, chainsaw into my workshop and fix it, which I completed with some modifications. So now to clean the thing up before using it again, so I started my air compressor to blow the gunge out of the devious crevices that the manufacturers devised. After a few minutes of use there was a racket from inside my workshop and my air compressor subsided in a heap of scrap. Now I need to buy a new compressor!

Domestic duties demand attention, so to hell with all this engineering! Load up the washing machine and get the laundry done.....Except that...no water. The water main down the road had burst again, and there were men (why never women in this age of equality) digging up the road. Bitter experience dictates that when the supply resumes it will be of the consistency of oxtail soup, so if the washing machine starts up the clothes will come out a uniform brown and capable of growing herbs. Not that job then! Dishwasher? No, forget that too!

Since the heatwave in Ireland seems to have ameliorated a little, I really should cut the grass with the new tractor mower that I bought four months ago to replace the one that fell apart when the paint no longer held the rust together.

But now caution warns: If I start up my new mower to cut the grass, will it actually work long enough for me to get it out of its shed? If I buy a new compressor which of my air tools will be the first to fail? And if when all this is done I attack that damned tree again with my refurbished chainsaw will the tree fall on my car or on me?

This reliance upon modern technology is clearly a forlorn hope since all of that technology is fundamentally hostile. In fact the only modern technology that I find to work every time is the cap of my bottle of Highland malt, so I intend to rely upon that from now on ..... and in bed! (Jester)
 

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I had a massive area of grass to look after until recently, I cut random wanders through the grass and loved it. I changed this every year, to avoid build up of coarse bottom growth (not wanted, but, please, no comments). Push mower did it for me.
 

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Grass? What grass; I thought you were having a heatwave in Blighty.

Right now all I've got on my "lawn" is the seasonal shower of Arbutus (aka Madrona) tree leaves that need to be raked, or blown, off it. They are brittle leaves that do not break down. I have been looking at them for days, from the comfort of my sun deck and pondering on my course of action - after I've finished another six pack of Bitburg.
 

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You do realise that the chainsaw and the compressor, and the shredder, are all in the same union?
Just as well you didn't try to fire up the shredder, it would have come out in sympathy.
Make sure the new lawnmower is kept away from the other machines - You don't want it picking up any bad habits or militancy.
 

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The entire Universe is hostile. You have to plot deep and dark into the night to achieve your revenge.

Failing that (and you probably will fail in that,) … go down the pub. (Pint)
 

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I use hand tools: bowsaw, pole saw, clippers, hatchet etcetera. The bow saw will cut to a depth of seven and a half inches, so logs more than 14" thick need a vee cut to accommodate the bowsaw frame. This is rare. I have much wood yet to cut, mainly brushwood. Previously I cut logs large and small and twigs for kindling. When I had enough kindling I used the hatchet to chop twigs into very small pieces to rot in the ground, which it has done. However this is such a slow process that I'm considering buying a shredder/chipper to reduce the small twigs.

As mentioned in a previous thread, I use a rotary mower for grass and other things that grow amongst it. Will I be taking a risk by allowing another machine onto the premises? Do machines gang up on us if there are several of them? I have another rotary mower in France. I was planning to bring it over on our next trip. Now I'm wondering if this would be wise.
 

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The one advantage we organic machines have over the mechanical types is that we know where the 'on/off' switch is.

Mind you, I'm starting to worry a tiny bit, because recently when I switched off a machine that was annoying me, I'll swear blind in its dying revs I heard it mutter in an Austrian accent: 'Oil be bock.'

In order to test this I asked my 'Alexa' (Amazon/NSA/GCHQ/FSB method of putting a microphone into your home at your own expense.)

"Alexa, Oil be bock." (You might have to adjust your accent a tad) and guess what she replied … and this is no sh1t, I've just done it. :eek:

"Hasta la Vista, baby." (Try it and see. (EEK) )
 

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Robert, I would say that depends on whether the French mower is bi-lingual.
You may get the opposite of ganging up. They might sulk because they each suspect that one will be replacing the other.
 

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Go back in time, all of you , there is nothing more peaceful to the worker or the watcher than a man on a sythe . The long rhythmic blows , the body artistry, the pauses to whet the blade with your stone, little noise either, only grunts and
Swearing.

Bob
 

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Go back in time, all of you , there is nothing more peaceful to the worker or the watcher than a man on a sythe . The long rhythmic blows , the body artistry, the pauses to whet the blade with your stone, little noise either, only grunts and
Swearing.

Bob
Something tells me you would probably not do well playing Grand Theft Auto. (Jester)
 

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Ever heard of an axe? I never trust anything that requires engineering know how.
 

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Ever heard of an axe? I never trust anything that requires engineering know how.
I have an axe. In fact I have two....One is one of those big lumps that American loggers use to cut down Redwoods and which I usually attempt to use to cut up logs but generally miss with each swipe. It is a continual surprise to me how far a log can fly when sideswiped, and since I have just had my house double glazed I am wary of flying logs. I have a smaller hand axe, but cutting down a tree with that is nowadays beyond me. I have a bow saw, but that can stay hung up in the shed as I don't need that sort of exercise at my age and, anyway, the blade is rusted(and can stay like that!).

So I have long invested in chainsaws and a big shredder powered by a four-stroke 12 hp engine and numerous other "labour-saving" devices that often take up more time fixing them than they save, but .....fixing a chainsaw on my workshop bench uses up a lot less physical effort than trying to cut down a tree with a bow saw, and that is OK by me! (Jester)
 

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Some may remember the BBC Interludes that used to fill up holes in air time during the 1950's. I thought there was one of a man working a scythe, but can't find it anywhere. There were others, a potters wheel, a man ploughing with horses, a man building a bonfire and so on.
I found this one, London to Brighton in four minutes via railway in 1953.

https://youtu.be/TtiWQkW0v0o

There are some modern versions of the same run on You Tube which display some mighty changes.
 

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Some may remember the BBC Interludes that used to fill up holes in air time during the 1950's. I thought there was one of a man working a scythe, but can't find it anywhere. There were others, a potters wheel, a man ploughing with horses, a man building a bonfire and so on.
I found this one, London to Brighton in four minutes via railway in 1953.

https://youtu.be/TtiWQkW0v0o

There are some modern versions of the same run on You Tube which display some mighty changes.
That was some film you contributed. As a boy I remember the Brighton Belle being advertised on station hoardings. Victoria to London in 60 minutes so a mile a minute. Seeing all the infrastructure fly by reminded me how much we owe Stephenson, Brunel and their ilk. A lasting system built to serve the masses and nowadays, for a price, in fair comfort
Nick
 

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Some may remember the BBC Interludes that used to fill up holes in air time during the 1950's. I thought there was one of a man working a scythe, but can't find it anywhere. There were others, a potters wheel, a man ploughing with horses, a man building a bonfire and so on.
I found this one, London to Brighton in four minutes via railway in 1953.

https://youtu.be/TtiWQkW0v0o

There are some modern versions of the same run on You Tube which display some mighty changes.
From the driver's point of view the big change between the 1953 and the 1983 version is more trees and less signal boxes. Nowadays the signal boxes have all gone and Network Rail are chopping down trees again.
 

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I have an axe. In fact I have two....One is one of those big lumps that American loggers use to cut down Redwoods and which I usually attempt to use to cut up logs but generally miss with each swipe. It is a continual surprise to me how far a log can fly when sideswiped, and since I have just had my house double glazed I am wary of flying logs. I have a smaller hand axe, but cutting down a tree with that is nowadays beyond me. I have a bow saw, but that can stay hung up in the shed as I don't need that sort of exercise at my age and, anyway, the blade is rusted(and can stay like that!).

So I have long invested in chainsaws and a big shredder powered by a four-stroke 12 hp engine and numerous other "labour-saving" devices that often take up more time fixing them than they save, but .....fixing a chainsaw on my workshop bench uses up a lot less physical effort than trying to cut down a tree with a bow saw, and that is OK by me! (Jester)
Art, you could get into more trouble if you bought an electro-hydraulic log splitter. Ours in France could fire a 15 inch log 50ft in two directions out in the open. In the garage, when we first used it, it took out one window and a set of shelving. Mind you, in six years of combat it never failed!!

JJ.
 

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After a life with cathode followers, succeeded by emitter followers (who remembers these, let alone the formula for the output impedance of same? Mind you, it was vital to know this as it was a standard interview question for the men in suits) I've had enough of technology. My last job was engineer in charge of the largest TV drama studio in Europe -- but now I can't be bothered to learn how to drive the remote control for the fancy new TV and recorder. That's the wife's department. If she's out, I read a book.
 
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